“When his parents saw him, they were astonished, and his mother said to him, “Son, why have you done this to us? Your father and I have been looking for you with great anxiety.”
And he said to them, “Why were you looking for me? Did you not know that I must be in my Father’s house?”
But they did not understand what he said to them.”
Luke 2:48-50 (NAB)
Pilgrims used to go together in a large group, traveling from Nazareth to Jerusalem, to celebrate the festival of Passover each year. For safety in numbers, they traveled in a caravan, and within that crowd was Mary, Joseph and Jesus. It was a three day journey, stopping along the way to replenish their food and water supply.
After Passover, on the way back from Jerusalem, they realized Jesus was missing from the group. They first searched for him among their relatives and friends. When he couldn’t be found, his parents left the others to return to Jerusalem, and search for their son.
Jesus was twelve years old at the time, the usual age of beginning to transition from boy to man. After celebrating the Passover, something must have stirred him to stay behind, and spend time talking with the elders in the Temple.
It took his parents three days to find him. They trusted in God, but they had to wonder why He would allow their son to go missing in the first place. The gospel account tells us that Mary and Joseph became very anxious while searching for their son for three days. Who wouldn’t?
Some of us may have had an experience of our own, that caused us to agonize or worry for three days, before finding something, someone or receiving some answer. It might have been three days of waiting for the results of a medical test, or for a response from a loved one or an organization. Whatever we are waiting for, three days can feel like eternity. Although our faith is tested and strengthened after every trial, each new problem still brings new worries.
Mary and Joseph were holy, faithfilled people, but even they, being human, agonized looking for Jesus those three days. Any parent can relate to them, with our concerns for our own children.
When they finally found Him in the temple, Mary asked,
“Son, why have you done this to us? For a moment, it sounded like they felt abandoned by him, as Mary told Jesus that they were looking for him with “great anxiety.”
Mary asks Jesus why he has “done this to them.” When anyone disappoints us in a major way, it feels like they have “done something to us.” It’s easy to become the victim, as a natural human response toward those we love. We forget that God is still working out a purpose for the good of everyone’s life and destiny.
Jesus answers his mother, reminding her that he has his own mission, saying,
“Did you not know that I must be in my Father’s house?”
Scripture tells us that Mary and Joseph didn’t understand a word of His said to them. Parents don’t always understand their children, but God does.
Every person has their own journey of faith to travel. We cannot always know what our children’s journey will be, just as children don’t always know how deeply their actions affect their parents. Mary and Joseph must have felt perplexed that God would permit their son to be lost for three long days. God’s purposes are not always revealed, even to Mary and Joseph. Every trial is a part of our journey, but not the end of the story.
There is a fairly new resident of the Nursing Home, who has a room next to my son’s. He’s about the same age as Jon, but he appears to have been born blind and deaf. He sits by himself in the large Day room every day. Only one other resident knows sign language and he occasionally speaks to him, otherwise no one can communicate with him.
When I bring wrapped candies to share with the residents, I need to gently touch Martin’s hand, or else he gets startled with sudden touch. I place the candy near his hand and he reaches out, picks it up, unwraps it and quickly eats it. The last few times, I placed candy in front of him, he makes a drinking motion with his hand, so I got him a drink of water, and he drank the whole glass. I never before thought about what it’s like to be deaf, mute, blind and very thirsty.
I look at Martin and wonder about his life, existing alone in a totally silent, dark world, with so few people who can communicate with him. I never see any visitors with him, and I wonder if he ever feels lost, sad or abandoned. I wonder if his parents are even living, or if they ever felt that they lost a son, due to his many handicaps. I wonder if perhaps, he was abandoned long ago.
I don’t know much about Martin, but I do know that God made him, and loves him as much as any of us. He wants to be a Father to him, to speak to his heart, and comfort him, despite the challenges he was born with. So, I pray that Martin can come to know that truth.
Some parents know the feeling of losing a child, and some children may have felt abandoned by their parents, but God put a hunger in every heart to seek Him, since He is a Father to all the fatherless. We are all at different stages of our faith journey, with turning points that take us deeper with Him, just as young Jesus did, when he stayed behind in the Temple for three days.
Lord, comfort the hearts of all parents who have lost a child in any way, and comfort those who have ever felt abandoned. As a father to all the fatherless, we pray you will reveal your persistent, unconditional and devoted love for all of us. Amen
